Kendo practitioners in leadership positions can neglect their own kendo development due to their responsibilities inside and outside of kendo. I stopped competing and attending seminars for myself once I started national team coaching and organising the Oceania Women’s Seminar and Taikai. Although I was developing other skill-sets and enjoying the enriching experiences and relationships in these positions, I neglected my own my kendo development. I find it difficult to have more than one focus in kendo. I admire people that can balance leadership and their own kendo skill development successfully.
Furthermore, leaders in kendo can also become complacent towards their own kendo due to the status and power associated with higher ranks. Pursuing physical kendo improvement can be uncomfortable and expensive. The pursuit can also lead to feelings of insecurity, frustration, or dissatisfaction with one’s kendo and training environment. Conversely, continuous learning can help sensei become better role-models and more empathetic to the emotions and challenges that their students experience in kendo.
Leaders are also often their own sensei, and are rarely given or open to advice or feedback. It is imperative that leaders, as role-models engage in self-reflection and proactively seek feedback on their teaching methods and kendo proficiency. A good scholar constantly interogates their own knowledge and understands that knowledge is constantly in motion. It is also however critically important to be discerning about who kendo guidance is sourced from. It does not have to be the most successful or renowned kendo sensei.
I have personally found that the most insightful and beneficial feedback can come from less known or accomplished sensei. The most meaningful and helpful feedback has been presented at times that I have felt seen by sensei. Specifically, when I am seen and understood through my kendo movements. The ability to see and feel an individual’s essence and to present them with feedback accordingly is a rare and a valuable skill to have in kendo, yet it is often underappreciated.
It is also important to seek advice from kendo sensei who demonstrate a style of kendo or attribute that you respect and admire. The points of admiration and respect are personal and can reflect aspects that may be underdeveloped in yourself and/or kendo, what you wish to embody, or what you have already hold but have not yet found a way to express it or allowed it to manifest. Admirable attributes are not limited to skill or achievement as I mentioned. Personally, I do have great respect for sensei that utilise kendo for personal development and take great responsibility to guide their students with kindness and authenticity. Being drawn to certain sensei is not always understandable. It can be interpreted as en 縁 ―a mysterious force that connects you to another person. The duration of the connection is uncertain.
The sensei I seek advice from most often have sound basics that I believe is a reflection of how they value the relationship between practical kendo and personal development. Both of which certain sensei demonstrate through their kendo and the way in which they interact with and support growth in others.
Last week I travelled to Finland to train with Markus Frey sensei (7 dan kyoshi). It is not clear why I felt it was so important to train with Frey sensei. I simply felt in my heart that it was a possibility and that he would likely provide useful and meaningful feedback about my kendo. I had trained with Frey sensei more than 10-years ago and recall feeling incredible pressure through his seme. He is also an approachable person that is serious about kendo and as I discovered closely connects kendo with personal development. We also have a mutual connection through Nippon Taiiku Daigaku or Nippon Sport Science University (Nittaidai). The Nittaidai kendo style and sensei have been extremely influential in my kendo journey. I doubt I would have continued kendo if I had not been exposed to Nittaidai kendo and used it to connect personal development to my physical kendo.
In Helsinki, I had two sessions with Frey sensei. One morning session with Helsingin Kendoseura Ki-Ken-Tai-Icchi (Helsinki Kendo Club) and a one-hour afternoon session with only Frey sensei and Mercedesz Czimbalmos (6 dan renshi).
During our first keiko, my seme was ineffective against Frey sensei and I felt pinned by his mental and physical preparedness, intent, and pressure that evolved into decisive waza. After our keiko he explained that I needed to work on shodachi, as well as my seme and tame. I already knew that this was something I needed to work on but I had not found a way to develop these areas. In the afternoon, Frey sensei taught effective execises that strengthen seme and tame. The exercises were accompanied with explanations that connected mind and body―kendo and life. The words resonated deeply, fostering a sense of empowerment. Reconnecting my kendo practice with my personal life felt empowering―a feeling I have missed.
The process of developing seme and tame are notoriously challenging, yet essential for high-level kendo and for the cultivation of personal growth. Specifically, seme and tame that lacks intent does not mentally/physically prepare one to cope with the discomfort of being in that open space between attacks when tame is being engaged with by both kenshi and one has more experience managing that open space than the other. Stepping into that space with lack of intention is a gamble, and one that is unlikely to culminate with successful waza. If it does, it is likely to be attributed to luck.
During the training I became aware how my seme lacked intention and how uncomfortable I felt being in that open space after seme. It resulted in cutting too soon, when an opportunity had not yet been fully developed and when I felt pressure to just do something to release the discomfort. Immediately I could see how this plays out in other areas of my life. Specifically, how I escape discomfort or stress by trying to move away from it rather than sitting in it prepared with intention and the courage and clarity to work through it with the intent of success.
It is always interesting to see what happens when you try to apply what you have learned in another kendo context in your home dojo. On the first training at home, I focused on seme with intention and bringing up the left foot as the tame foot and staying in issoku itto no ma for longer periods. It was not as difficult/uncomfortable as I expected and I felt clearer and more confident in my seme. My intention felt clearer before the seme. My eyes and heart were also more open, observing and engaging with my opponents. This newfound awareness represents a significant positive step forward and is a key area that requires ongoing dedication and effort regularly tested against higher-graded opponents.
Other blog posts in this series:
#1 One Step Closer: Starting again.
Kate Sylvester Perspectives 